The Titanic designers claimed it was unsinkable. Hence, on the night it hit an iceberg and began sinking, crews discovered that they did not have enough lifeboats. Given the limited resources, the order went out to prioritize women and children. There was a problem: some officers interpreted this order as women and children only. Hence many lifeboats departed the Titanic with empty seats.
Last week Vice President J.D. Vance caused a firestorm of debate by invoking ordo amoris, the order of love. This concept has its origins in ancient Greek philosophy, natural law and Christian scripture. It is the idea that we have varying degrees of love and obligations to others based on their relation to us such as birth and proximity. Hence, we are obligated to love our parents more than strangers we’ve never met. We must love God most of all as our creator. St. Thomas Aquinas also taught that this varies according to time, circumstance, and necessity (such as providing assistance to a stranger when that person is in need). Pope Francis recently wrote a letter to the bishops of the United States in which he said, “The true ordo amoris that must be promoted is that which we discover by meditating constantly on the parable of the “Good Samaritan”that is, by meditating on the love that builds a fraternity open to all, without exception.”
In the debate some argued that the ordo amoris excludes people and therefore goes against Christ’s command to love everyone. Others argued that given our limited resources we must prioritize those who are closest to us. Returning to the Titanic analogy, both sides miss the boat. Saying that we must love everybody does nothing for the reality that there are limited lifeboats. The captain knew he had to prioritize women and children first so that at least they had the possibility of being rescued. Saying that we must prioritize this or that group only would mean wasted resources. The officers erred by sending boats with empty seats.
Ordering our love does not necessarily mean we exclude people. In fact, it is by ordering our loves that we can most effectively love God and neighbor.
